


you are the reason

by teawriter



Category: K (Anime)
Genre: K project rarepair week 2019, Past Character Death, day 1: fluff/angst, yall know which one I was going to pick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-09
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2019-11-17 21:24:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18106757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teawriter/pseuds/teawriter
Summary: For a moment, Fushimi thinks he’s back at Scepter 4.Then Munakata Reisi walks in, sees him, and stops.Song: You are the Reason, Callum Scott





	you are the reason

For a moment, Fushimi thinks he’s back at Scepter 4.

Everything looks the same; the beige walls are still there, same with the wooden doors, and next to him is a  _bonsai_ tree on a table. His glasses are there too. Light filters in from a tall window on the far side of the room and throws everything into stark white focus. 

He’s memorized the layout of the whole building, been to every single room until they are as familiar as the back of his hand, and this one is the same; this is his dorm, and has been for more than three years. This is his room; he’s sure of it.

... Then why is his desk missing? Why, when he finally bothers to get out of bed and put on his glasses, can’t he see out the window when he walks over to it? Why is everything white, why is it cold, and why is he _alone_?

His hand taps absently against his hip- and he remembers. 

 

> _The mission to infiltrate JUNGLE at any cost, including and not limited to his life._
> 
> _The betrayal- both of them._
> 
> _The building, crumbling to pieces in front of him and behind him and all around him. The sky, tinged with red, green, silver, and electric, electric blue._
> 
> _The sweet, cool darkness when he closed his eyes_.

It comes back to him the same way that waves crash against the shore: slowly, and then all at once. Through the frantic haze clouding his senses he wonders if anyone made it- if Misaki’s alive, if Anna’s alive, Lieutenant, Kusanagi, Captain, anyone—

The doors creak and groan and push in on themselves as they swing open inwards. Then— 

— Then _Munakata Reisi_  walks in, sees him, and stops. His face crumples; Fushimi’s breath catches.  _No, not you. Please not you_. 

“Captain...”

”Fushimi-kun.” A smile that’s too tired and too devastated and not fooling either of them at all pulls at the corners of Munakata’s mouth. He walks forward; Fushimi moves to meet him halfway, like always. “I had hoped to reunite with you differently.”

“Me too.” His head is spinning. He might call this a dream- but people don’t dream when they’re dead. “Captain, what... I thought...”

”It seems that the end came for me much sooner than expected.” The smile turns slightly bitter. “My sword was on its way down. You can guess what followed after.”

Lieutenant must have been heartbroken. Or maybe Zenjou did it, like he did for the last Blue King; maybe he’s sad too. Fushimi reaches out for his King before he falters- and pulls back his hand. “... Did it hurt?”

Munakata takes his hand anyway, turns it over, and runs his thumb along the palm. “No more than necessary, I assure you. It was... as charitable a killing I could have hoped for.”

The long silence that follows is deafening, overwhelmingly so now that they’re touching, now that there’s an expression on the Captain’s face looking too close to self-loathing. Fushimi wants to break it, to say something or scream until the aftersound of the noise is the only thing that rings in the room; the words build up in the back of his throat, scathing torrents of anger and desperation and _why why why_ , and ultimately die before they ever reach his tongue. 

“Fushimi-kun, I must apologize for... for the way things turned out in the end. You catered to the whims of a desperate man and paid the blood price for it.”

”Why are you apologizing? It’s not like either of us didn’t understand the risk.”

“I had forgotten that there are times that risks become possible outcomes. This was one that I hadn’t even considered would happen.”

”... Idiot.” On an impulse, he laces their fingers together; the mad rush of his heartbeat momentarily calms. “You can’t predict everything, Captain. You’re human, not a fortune teller or whatever.”

What is it with Kings thinking they’re superhuman, or invincible? All they are, are people with gifted power to use until their time arrives- and it’s maddening to see Munakata try and carry the world on his shoulders just because of it. “It’s not like you could have known that I would die.”

”I’m afraid you misunderstand me a little.” The touch against his cheek makes him pause, but only a little; quiet self-loathing flickers through violet eyes. “I had always intended for you to return to me, unharmed and alive. That it didn’t happen is a failure on my part.”

That’s it; Fushimi steps back until the only way they are connecting is with their hands, takes in the slight widening of Munakata’s eyes, and unleashes everything that’s been building behind walls since the night he walked away from the Blue clan. “And what about you, huh? You think you get to be excused from that? You think that you’re the only one trying to save people?”

”Fu-”

“I didn’t open that door so you could die afterwards, I opened that door so you could live because everyone was trying to save _you_. How do you think it makes me feel knowing you’re dead?”

Silence. Good, at least he’s listening.

”How do you think Lieutenant feels, or the rest of them? Or Anna? You’re not- you weren’t _alone_  anymore, Captain, you didn’t need to carry that by yourself, but you did anyway. You always tell me to keep my mind open, but you just tried your damned hardest to _die_ instead of looking for other options.

“Let’s face it, I was going to die anyway. If the building falling on me didn’t kill me, someone from JUNGLE would have. But you were different, dammit! You were supposed to be different, you were supposed to survive! I don’t care if you sent me to my death or whatever, hell I don’t care about what you said that night because you were supposed to get on with your life, you were supposed to _live_ —”

In one movement Munakata pulls him close, and that just about finishes him off; he sinks into his King’s arms, holding him the exact same way the day before it all fell to pieces, and clings onto his shirt, looking like a child be damned. “You could have just left me... just forgot about me and moved on with your life, but you didn’t... you didn’t and you died, idiot Reisi.”

“How could I forget about you,” he hears Munakata say, voice strained, “when the last time I ever spoke to you was to hurt you and drive you away? Do you honestly believe that if I had lived, I would forgive myself for that and just move on as if nothing happened? Fushimi-kun, the price of stopping Nagare Hisui might have been both of our lives, but even so I am happy- because I can see you again.”

Until now Fushimi hadn’t realized that Mihashira was still a scar, still an aching wound lingering beneath layers upon layers of self-inflicted numbness and thoughts of _this is how things were, and this is how they will always be_. Until now he hadn’t ever considered that the rawness in his chest, there since he turned his back on Munakata, was the need to see his King spilling over into the physical world.

And now, even at the end, even though this isn’t how either of them wanted to meet again, they are here- together. He presses his face into Munakata’s shoulder, mumbles out “Still an idiot” even as he pulls him closer. 

“I am an idiot,” his King agrees, and there’s a feather-light press at his temple. “But it is worth it.”

The doors burst open once more. And since Fushimi has long acknowledged that he is a walking ball of irritation, he lets said irritation overwhelm him enough to pull apart from Munakata and get ready to snap at the intruder—

It’s Totsuka. Totsuka with his billion different hobbies, his camera and his guitar, his pink butterflies, and his face going through twenty different emotions in the span of a second before it settles on joy.

”Hey,” he says. “We have so much to catch up on.”


End file.
